Melbourne Marathon

Done! 4:45

Off the wagon.

And in little more detail..

At the start line with 20 minutes to spare after some frantic map reading by three out of towners. Ralph, who had flown in from Kununurra, and I looked quite the couple in sequential numbers and matching shoes and iPod holders. Nipples and blister toes already taped, prep was some stretching, a slash, a carbo shot, and a liberal dosing of vaseline. More pissed off with the bloke in love with his own voice on the tannoy than nervous. Wheelchair off first and then us. Metallica’s 10 minute To Live is to Die was an epic enough start and valuable energy lost to brief bursts of air guitar. Ralph wishes me well and heads off.

45 minutes, first carbo shot and feeling OK. Heart rate at 166 so I thought I’d back off a bit. Hard to let people slide past but I had to run my own race to finish. Chatted with a runner from Osaka. By one hour I felt good, it was a steady pace and the back pain hadn’t caused me any grief. Anything that was going to cause me any trouble would have shown up by now, just some tight ham strings.

Toni was waiting at 16km and I grabbed some new carbo shots and a few snakes. Onwards to the hilly part, nothing too bad just gentle rolling hills.

The 21km point was a mixed blessing. I still had a half marathon to run and my hamstrings were still hurting. Otherwise I felt OK, breathing normally, no chafing, 155 heart rate. It was just a matter of finishing.

Starting to get into some serious kilometre watching at this point and each sign was an exercise in subtraction and fractions. Perfect weather but getting warm, around the mid twenties and very sunny. Forehead felt like Lake Eyre. Saw Toni again – more snakes and carbo shots.

32km was a good point, only 10km. Soon after nearly burst into tears when Johnny Cash sings You’ll Never walk Alone. Saw Toni again and grabbed some banana. Legs burning but kept going and kept a smile on my face. Called a cyclist a cunt for weaving onto the course and felt better.

The last 5km was the hardest. The was a large amount of dissonance between what was only 5km and this. I’d run all the way except at drink stations but I gave up a bit of time to walk the last 50m of each kilometer. 36km, 37km, 38km, 39km, 40km, 41km, 400m.

Radio Birdman’s Aloha Steve and Danno came on. A rush of blood to the head so I bumped up into canter and finished with a fast jog.

Grabbed my medal.

Ralph had finished in an outstanding 3:59 and another friend had done the half marathon in 1:49 and then stood in awe of somebody standing around laughing after a 3:00 marathon time.

A barbie, a bath, a massage and a quiet counter meal with a more sedate game of scrabble. Fine but tired and legs that hurt and had done more than enough bending for the day.

The Marathon Playlist: A Man of Action Dislikes Eye of the Tiger With a Great Passion



  1. tokyo goat’s avatar

    imagine if the appeal was gone, the taste somehow less desirable…..nahhh…ridiculous talk…CHEERS TO ANTHONY

  2. Reid’s avatar

    Hi Anthony,

    Let us know how you did!

  3. Anthony’s avatar

    Andrew – it tasted gooooood
    Reid – Done!

  4. obachan’s avatar

    Wow… something I’ll never be able to do. Impressive!

  5. tokyo goat’s avatar

    there you go. FACKIN’ FANTASTIC!!…..and you owe it all to snakes..wonder which ones were the best, red or green, cause we all know yellow snakes are shite…

  6. Robert’s avatar

    Nice one, mate.

  7. Anonymous’s avatar

    Omedeto! Absolute champion I would say. To finish 42km in a fast jog is mighty impressive. Good on Ralph too!

  8. s’s avatar

    Way to go Anthony – that is a stunning achievement!

  9. Jeanne’s avatar

    Good on yer! I stand in awe – I can’t even drag my sorry butt to gym twice a week, let alone train for anything. And as for giving up the booze… nooooooo!!

    Welcome back to the land of the living!!

  10. Anthony’s avatar

    Oi thanks all no magic in it, just plugging away and avoiding stairs for a day or two after.
    Back to cooking and beer research for a while I think.

  11. Anonymous’s avatar

    Congrats Anthony!

    Very impressive. So now you can go back on junk food only diet now? ;-)


  12. Anthony’s avatar

    Thanks Pim. Junk food diet? Moi? I was pretty happy to be back on good old fashioned protein and alcohol and if I never see another tube of sweet artificially flavoured paste, it’ll be too soon.

  13. Brett Mitsch’s avatar


    good on ya mate. Have just done NYC Marathon (first one) and absolutely feel the pain coming through your words.

    Also understand the tear-ing up at the sounds of spectators and soul stirring music.

    Gotta say 26.2 miles sounds a hellofa lot shorter than 42KM.


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