The Spiceblog Classic Food Writing Series- No. 1 Richard Metzler

Just finished reading the above Richard Metzler book I picked up in Melbourne. Metzler, is a rock writer most famous for, and should be for more, not listening to many of the albums he reviewed. Which is no bad thing. If I had to listen to some of the shit that comes out and lets face it, my friend Ollie, is the most honest man on earth, for admitting he bought a BS album for her “tasty bod” – good for him. I had to abandon efforts to have the Rugby Super 14 in Perth just to avoid listening to 2.85 more Cosima songs. And you don’t want to listen too much, if you’ve ever been cornered by a Grateful Dead fan and made the mistake of suggesting it’s boring and then being told “I had to really *listen*”. Actually I’ve even gotten over the takes a few listens stage of my music listening life, if it’s not hitting some switches in 15 seconds then I can’t be bothered. But this is a food blog so what’s my point, oh yes, a fine piece mentioning the “Cigar Store Indians” (?) as little as possible by recounting a visit to the mythical (?) National Soup Museum in Biloxi.

Most fascinating, perhaps, are the displays in the Extinct Wing, devoted to flavours which for various reasons have through the years been removed from company rosters. These include:

Olive and Watercress, Homemade Gull Chunk, Dawg, Maraschino Kidney, Wax, Cream of Pupa, Turkey Glutton, Olde Fashioned Gruel, Black Putty, Chicken with Starch, Pond Salamander, Blowfish Noodle, Sow Butt, Airedale Tenderloin, Badger Biproduct, Scrod Gill, Striated Mutton Pulp, Sour Barnacle, Sparrow Cauliflower, Cootie Broth, Puff Ball…Creamy Prune, Stove Top Marigold, Imitation Penguin……..Puppy Eyes, Udder and Donut, Weasel Plop, Szechuan Pigeon Foot, Parsnip & Cricket, Steroid and Gluten, Whale Vulva, Aerated Mucus, Styptic with Toenail Bits, Toad Scum, Tartar Control Moth, Jogsweat Lite, and Fat-Free Pantyhose.

I’d be hard pressed to add a single worthy addition to this perfection. Pressure Sore Potage?

Mail!: The Drummer (begrudging coif solo) from the Kryptonics writes!


Just somehow stumbled onto your blog as I was stuffing around googling old names and songs…

Did you ever get hold of the Kryptonics song? I noticed you were searching for Oedipus complex but you quoted lyrics from “baby”. I still have the original 45 but its pretty badly looked after.

He’s right – memories eh! Oedipus Complex is

Coz’ girl I’ve got an Oedipus Complex

And girl, I think that you’re my mother.

Little better ever and *this* is why acquired taste is bogus.


  1. Santos’s avatar

    oh lud. please tell me it was bs c.1972 in her “what’s up doc?” days.

  2. Anthony’s avatar

    , but not.

  3. Reid’s avatar

    Hey…I liked Cosima! =P

  4. Anthony’s avatar

    No you’re thinking of Cosine – the cosine of an angle is the ratio of the length of the adjacent side to the length of the hypotenuse, which is very handy for calculating tree heights.

  5. Reid’s avatar

    Har, har!

  6. Anthony’s avatar

    No you mean r r which is the area of a circle/pi… hey any more maths gags out there?


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